Il sesso è una cosa assolutamente naturale ma tutti i genitori sanno che parlarne con i figli può essere davvero imbarazzante ed è per questo che rimandano il più possibile questo momento, sperando che siano le maestre di scuola le prime a spiegare come nascono i bambini. Mel Watt, la mamma blogger, diventata famosa per aver spiegato cosa significa fare sesso per i genitori dei bambini piccoli, ha fatto parlare ancora di sé.

Sulla sua pagina “The Modern Mumma”, cioè “La mamma moderna”, dopo aver affermato che, a volte, le performance sessuali tra mamma e papà sono davvero deludenti e brevi a causa della stanchezza e della mancanza di tempo, ha raccontato del terribile momento in cui suo figlio l’ha sentita mentre consumava un rapporto intimo con il marito, tanto da chiederle di abbassare la voce. “Sono traumatizzata. Suo padre è traumatizzato. Credo che entrambi vogliamo dimenticare ciò che è successo”, ha dichiarato Mel, ancora shoccata per quanto accaduto.

La cosa più terribile è che non sa assolutamente cosa ha pensato suo figlio, visto che ha fatto finta che non fosse successo nulla. A questo punto, ha intenzione di spiegare il prima possibile a suo figlio come nascono i bambini, senza utilizzare le solite storie della cicogna o dell'ape. La cosa la imbarazza non poco, anche perché, essendo il suo primo bambino, non sa assolutamente come fare. Nonostante ciò, è determinata a fare questo "grande passo", essere ascoltata durante una performance sessuale è stato davvero troppo imbarazzante per poter essere dimenticato.

"I thought dad didn't want another baby?" In that moment I knew he was pretending to be asleep so he wouldn't get in trouble, when if fact he was wide awake. And just like that I stripped his childhood away from him and had another moment to add on my "worst mother trophy shelf" just days before he turns 10. For a while we've been going back and fourth over who was going to have the sex talk with our oldest son. I didn't want to, I figured I've got another two girls to get through so it's only right that one of his dad's did. Then I thought maybe he is too young. I figured he is my first child and I had no idea what an appropriate age would be. So I left it. This morning I wish we had that talk long before he heard about. Not from other people. Worse. But through thin walls. You see he didn't hear amazing passionate sex. He heard "well that was a waste of a load" from me and oh my favourite part "that was the worst" curtesy of the husband. Which it was. He said something funny and I laughed really hard and told him I'm honestly about to pee myself. So as you can imagine the things the 9 yo was hearing wasn't exactly nice. I'm traumatised. His dad is traumatised. His biological dad will be traumatised. And he? Well all he said was "could you possibly keep it down when you have sex?" To which I replied "Sure buddy, I'm sorry" wishing it was appropriate to say "I'll go neck myself over here." I messaged the husband straight away, I needed back up. I needed it stat. He was about to walk out the door for school and I didn't exactly want to be his Friday news day "My mum and dad wanted a baby, but dad wasted his load and it was terrible because mum nearly peed on dads penis" I think I'm going to take up celibacy until I'm old and senile and forget that this ever happened. And lucky for our son it's his birthday soon so instead of skate ramps he can get some physiological sessions and on Sunday both his dad's are going to sit down and have a talk. In the meantime I'll clean my sheets and try my luck at having another baby in 10 years. #Motheroftheyearnextyear

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